What Makes You Feel Fabulous?

Over the past several weeks, two of my best friends and I, and one of them in particular, have been having this discussion that increasingly reveals more about ourselves than we ever thought.  The original question posed was what makes you feel fabulous when you don't feel fabulous?

It could be phrased in many different ways--what do you do when you face rejection?  What do you do when you're in a funk?  What do you do when you're having a bad day?

Basically, what do you do when life isn't marching to your tune?

My response, which bothered my friend, was that I don't do anything.  If I'm feeling crappy, get hurt or rejected, I let myself feel it so I can process it and move on.  I think wallowing in something is a sign you haven't gotten to the bottom of it yet, and the only way you'll get there is to just let go and just feel it.  And yes, this means I probably spend a surprising amount of time in my sweatpants crying over Grey's Anatomy reruns, but it also means I appreciate the good times with inordinate enthusiasm.

It never really occurred to me why I feel so strongly about this, but two things have since cropped up; the first yesterday while I was watching Jersey Boys (omg it was amaaazing), and the second today, while I'm writing this.

1.  Jersey Boys Epiphany. There is an equal and opposite reaction to everything you feel, to everything that happens, a karmic balance.  Any success I achieve, large or small, will be matched by disappointment and hurt.  I know it's going to happen, it's okay that it will happen, so why should I fight it off so hard?  Forcing yourself to feel happy in bad times is like adding insult to injury, or like another friend reminds me, using a second knife to dig out the first knife you got stabbed with.

2.  Right Now Epiphany. You know why this is, really?  All this stuff about feeling it in the moment?  When my parents divorced it took me a very long time to actually deal with that.  When I was diagnosed with diabetes it took me a very long time to deal with that.  I have a long history of putting things off, putting on a happy face and being so convincing that I'm ok that I don't even realize it's a lie.

Forget that!

Here's to not feeling fabulous.  Here's to wallowing, crying, acting pitiful and lame, and overall, not shoving your emotions aside because they're inconvenient.  It just doesn't work for me, and more than that, it's totally dangerous.  So here's to feeling it!